<p>owl–I do not have to search months worth of posts for you. If you have been reading for awhile and have not taken away the same attitude from some posters that I have then I guess we just see things differently. So be it. </p>
<p>Mom–maybe being relatively new the outrageous posters have stood out to me like a sore thumb–IDK. When I first came on here it was because I was having a very bad time with my impending empty nest syndrome. The posts in that forum helped me ALOT. Thanks for re-assuring me that most people here are normal!!</p>
<p>shrink–I never meant to imply that if a kid doesn’t drink in high school that they would go loco in college. What I meant (and maybe did not say correctly) was that if a child is held so tightly that they are not allowed the opportunity to make the decision to drink or not then they are at a higher risk when they are totally turned loose. There are without a doubt kids that just say no to drinking at parties in high school. The point is they are given the opportunity to say no–not held on such a strict leash that they cannot experience that decision making process.
BTW-literature can pretty much be found to support whatever you want to support so I wouldn’t put so much stock in everything you read.
Also–if your daughter is indeed telling you the truth then I give here BIG kudos. </p>
<p>eagle–total agreement with that. One area that parents should insist on control is extra-curricular activities. Kids who have nothing constructive to do after school find non-constructive things to do. From my experience as well, these are the kids who get into the deepest trouble. Again–not all of them do–but it is a generality.</p>
<p>fearless–thankyou for your imput. You sound like an exceptionally together person who is well on their way to achieving their dreams. But again–I don’t believe that anyone–not even Dr HOrse (although I could be wrong) --meant to imply that parents should put no pressure on their kids. That is ridiculous. But too much pressure to succeed can and many times does backfire as the kid feels they can never please their parents–and more importantly may never please themself because they are always to busy trying to please their parents.<br>
Your parents seem to have gotten it just right.</p>