<p>I have a really strange teacher at my school. He tries to be all open with us, and I like that, but sometimes he goes over the line. The other day when he was describing a TV episode of greys anatomy, he did a female orgasm in front of the class (it related to the episode)?</p>
<p>anyone else have a story that tops this?</p>
<p>:O
tenchar.</p>
<p>O.o herh? umm...what?</p>
<p>I had a teacher rant about how we have the first affirmative action President and how soon more than half of the population wouldn't pay taxes and then we'd all be totally screwed.</p>
<p>But yours is ... um... better.</p>
<p>Well, my school got this new sub service this year, so the halls have recently been flooded with weird substitutes (instead of the normal ones from our town that we had up through last year). So we were working in class on the computers, and a kid puts on his iPod, then, for some reason, the sub starts yelling "Put on What I did for Love from A Chorus Line!" "Put it on or no music!" "What I did for love from a chorus line" "That's one of the best songs ever written". And obviously, nobody wanted to hear that song, whatever it is, and we were all awkwardly trying to figure out how someone could be that odd.</p>
<p>Oh, and my statistics teacher, who is old and lonesome, describing how they filter sperm to increase the chances of getting a desired trait.</p>
<p>My 48-yr-old MALE history teacher.
"Joanna....can you stay a minute after class?"
Brings me aside once everyone leaves.
"...So have you and Mike hooked up yet? You need to stop leading him on, girl. I can tell you are messing with his head. Don't play games. Oh, and if you do, remember to use a protection, kiddo."</p>
<p>58 yr-old- MALE English teacher: "i just loooooooooove your shoes!! WHERE did you get them???? hmmmm very nice......."
I never wore them to school again.</p>
<p>My language teacher points to a girl and a boy during class.
"Hey, I saw you two making out in my classroom yesterday afternoon."
Everybody turns to look at them.
"And somebody..........left this."
HE HOLDS UP A BRA.
Literally.</p>
<p>My biology teacher telling my friend as she's leaving:</p>
<p>"Have a nice Thanksgiving...and don't gain too much weight. You look good, thin."</p>
<p>^^^^ hahahahaha!!!!!!!</p>
<p>Last year we had a really, uhm...Odd...English teacher everyone hated. She constantly had to use a stupid timer. WE still are not sure what it was for. Someone in the class one day though decided to set it to beep every five minutes and somehow got it clipped to the back of her shirt. She looked everywhere in the class room to figure out where it was, but never found it.</p>
<p>Then, the same teacher, was sitting at her desk. The entire room was silent since we were working on reading. She suddenlly looks up, "Do you all hear that music!? I CAN HEAR THE MUSIC! WHERE'S THE MUSIC COMING FROM?!" There was no music. She wasn't kidding either.</p>
<p>Physics teacher:
"No, you're shaving wrong and that's why you cut yourself. This is how you shave...(and then he went on about it)"</p>
<p>In the middle of the class:
Girl: Did you guys find a bra after the homecoming dance?
Latin Teacher (a guy): Uh, no, not that I know of.
Girl: Well, my friend left a bra.
Latin Teacher: Maybe the janitors found it, and didn't know what it was, and threw it away. You should go ask them.</p>
<p>^ Wow, that sounds like my Latin teacher. lol
Complete spaz.</p>
<p>lol))
i had a sub once who told us how he and his wife walk naked at home because they are "used to each other"</p>
<p>last year I had a sub who, when heard that i'm from Ukraine told me that we don't have electricity, toilets, cars, etc... i argued with him for the whole class period, and found out that we don't have anything and our schools are harder because we need to do something to our country because it is so horible etc.....
It was the last day of school before i went back to Kiev... and he made me cry for like 3 hours(((( I hope he was fired</p>
<p>My econ teacher today: "Have a nice Thanksgiving! ....and don't have sex with the turkey"</p>
<p>My old English teacher gave birth to himself in class.</p>
<p>My chemistry teaches cannot pronounce her L's correctly.
When she frequently says the word "kilojoule," it comes out as "kill-a-jew." She's completely oblivious to it and has no idea why everyone breaks out in raucous laughter every time she says it. It made a Jewish girl in our class very upset, and she had to talk to her counselor.</p>
<p>also, one of my subs threw our lesson plan in the garbage literally, told us that he was going to be fired but that this was more important, and then told us a 9/11 conspiracy about how it was GWB's fault in conjuntion with walmart and he had overhead slides too to explain it. I dont know if he was fired though, it was pretty entertaining.</p>
<p>also, one of my subs threw our lesson plan in the garbage literally, told us that he was going to be fired but that this was more important, and then told us a 9/11 conspiracy about how it was GWB's fault in conjuntion with walmart and he had overhead slides too to explain it. I dont know if he was fired though, it was pretty entertaining.</p>
<p>I've decided there are several different kinds of subs in the world.
The kind that really do want to teach.
The kind that get a bit of extra cash, so they don't really care, but don't do too many things stupid.
The stupid kind. (This could be a combo of the first two.) You know the ones that talk and all you want to do is cover your ears and scream.
Then there's the kind that wants to get a message out so they "teach". They tend to bring in conspiracies. :)</p>
<p>Although a lot of this stuff is really funny, when you begin to think about it, some of what you are reporting is truly inappropriate, and you should report this to someone. There is absolutely no way that talking about this stuff in school can be condoned. These subs should be forbidden from coming back. I am a teacher, and too often subs are not properly vetted before they are hired. The only way this sort of thing might stop in your schools is if the students tell someone.</p>
<p>I had a sub a few times who was a real creeper.</p>
<p>-He said he lives in a giant tree house with no phone or electricity
-he claims to have a gas powered television
-If you respond "no" when he asks if you if you watch spongebob squarepants, he SCREAMS at you
-He randomly bursts into song; his particular favorite begins with "who lives in a pineapple under the sea"
-He says he has 12 kids; the girls are all named mary and the boys are all named john
-He asks gems like this: "What if there were no rhetorical questions?"</p>
<p>btw, he is about sixty and has a white beard and glasses. just for some imagery..</p>
<p>so one of my teachers will talk about his (multiple) ex-fiancees and just has a lot of awkward stories about them, like how he left one 2 weeks before the wedding.</p>
<p>then he told some kids that helen keller could do a lab better than they could after screwing up so badly.</p>
<p>he also has described multiple ways of killing our old teacher for not teaching us enough.</p>