<p>After reading this thread with interest, I shared your daughter’s “dilemma” with my Ds (current HS sophomore and junior). Their response was an astonished “wow, who IS this girl?!”. Since you said that her lengthy applications list was due to the selectivity of the schools and the assumption that she had to apply to 15+ schools just to get into a few, I wonder if you can now speculate about what it was that caused her acceptances across the boards. Clearly you/she didn’t expect it, or she would have winnowed the list prior to applying. But since many of these schools are a statistical reach for all excellent student scholars, and the odds are against so many acceptances, your D must have some amazing attribute or accomplishment! Care to share? If that feels like a personal or invasive Q, just ignore it, but I promised my curious girls I would at least ask :)!</p>
<p>“she is scared that Harvard will be SO competitive that she won’t be able to have that much fun”</p>
<p>Bosh. It is not any more competitive than its peers. The academic culture is not competitive. There are very competitive facets of the extracurricular scene, but you can choose whether to join the rat race or not. There are competitive and noncompetitive opportunities to participate in almost every type of activity (athletics, music, journalism, etc.).</p>
<p>“she loves her classes and professors, the city, the ECs, and she has a wonderful large group of like-minded friends”</p>
<p>What else is there to make a college student happy…the dorms? If a student who feels this way still doesn’t love the school and wants to transfer, I strongly suspect she will not be any happier at the second school. Speaking as a former transfer here.</p>
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<p>@Honeybee63
Honestly, we applied hoping that she will get into at least a few schools(2-5 at most) but not this many. However, we really only applied to 14 schools.</p>
<p>As a parent, I can only say that her essay gave her application a chance to be seen. She must also have had good recommendations from her teachers. We did not read them but I truly believe they were excellent. One of the teachers that wrote her LOR has always said that the only reward he expects from her is that she mentions him as her teacher whenever she wins the Nobel Prize. lol.</p>
<p>I know so many kids did as much work as she did, some even harder, but I think that the personal statement essay acts as love/hate at first sight. I am guessing they first fell in love with her essay and wanted to know more about her. As her parent, I have read that essay tons and tons of times and I feel really proud- if you would permit me-that she is my daughter. In her essay, she showed that she got all that we have been trying to teach her, she showed that as she matured, life became more meaningful to her and she found out her role in this life. It was very simple, rich and very engaging.</p>
<p>Having said all this, admission process is still a long shot. My advice is to shoot and see where you will land but that is after all the hard work.
Take this with a grain of salt as I am no admission officer.
Note: A few of the emails we got after her acceptances commented on her essay and LOR.</p>
<p>^I think what other posters want to see is the magic formula your daughter used to get in. :)</p>
<p>I am guessing she stood out in her overall credentials among other international students as well as having exceptional essays, but that it was the LORs that sealed the deal. Maybe “this is the brightest student I have ever taught” kind of thing. Good for her.</p>
<p>DD loved Columbia, and did not find the environment too competitive. Columbia students can take as many courses over at Barnard which can provide smaller (not less rigorous) classes and almost double the available sections. The subway to the hospital is not prohibitive, and the football games are played up there, too.</p>
<p>Cambridge is wonderful, too.</p>
<p>Brown is a place where many kids are truly happy.</p>
<p>Wash U and Hopkins do turn out a lot of doctors, and Duke does have wonderful research.</p>
<p>This is a decision with few consequences since all these schools are wonderful. Your D just has to decide which place beckons to her. They seem to all be in cities so the culture is not that different.</p>
<p>My D had a NYC or die attitude so she would have resented be sent to Harvard (no, she did not get in.) So to the poster who said that kids would not mind being sent to Harvard, that is not entirely true.</p>
<p>I have known kids to choose Yale, Brown, MIT, Carnegie Mellon over Harvard. My DS at Williams knew kids who had chosen Williams over Harvard.</p>
<p>Harvard does have the biggest name, but it doesn’t mean it’s the most enticing experience for everyone. I will say that Cambridge is better darn cute though and the opportunities at Harvard are myriad.</p>
<p>“Harvard = She likes the school but wonders if it will be too competitive” - Harvard has a lot of bright, accomplished students. But that’s true of all of the top school. My impression is that getting into Harvard is harder than surviving it. (This is mostly just from reading - no real data to back this up.)</p>
<p>Thanks for the reply Schoolfees. Your D sounds like a wonderful young woman, and I’m sure your input payed no small role in cultivating her accomplishments and sensibilities. She will make a contribution wherever she goes to college and beyond - sounds like someone who is more focused on serving and putting her gifts to use for others. Enjoy exploring the possibilities with her, and most of all enjoy your time with her!</p>
<p>Oh yes, this is such a difficult time, mine is down 2 or 3 and trying to decide… it seems hard not to step up and say this is best for you ! So hard… in my day Parents did this. Seemed to always work out.</p>
<p>But I know I can’t do this, ughhhh… but the Mom is pushing and has a bias and making it really hard for her and me, that is for sure.</p>
<p>Not a lot of time left… really difficult.</p>
<p>I am having the same problem with deciding on a school. I have been accepted to Ithaca in the Occupational Therapy program and also to Penn State in the Rehabilation and Human Services program. Going to Ithaca I can obtain my Masters in 5 years. But going to Penn State I would need to go to grad school for 2 years additional for a masters in OT. My parents think that I should go to Ithaca to obtain a masters in 5 years. Although my brother and best friend go to Penn State. Help not sure where to go to school?</p>
<p>If I pay, I say where MY money goes. I also say how much of my money goes there. I have a couple colleges that I refuse to spend a penny on. And I do step in to explain logistics like this college will call for more travel costs and that college, etc. I think parents need to parent their kids. My parents were not involved at all (my mom had a brain aneurysm and my dad was full of grief and trying to do all he had to do). I was 100% on my own. I wish I had someone to help. Our children need us. Talk to her. Tell her why you would pick X over Y.</p>
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When I start to think this way, I consider the possibility that my kids may one day have to pay for my nursing home…</p>
<p>I am glad I saw this thread…the past week has been a heartbreak for my husband and I as my son let us know his first choice is longer his first choice.</p>
<p>I can say we was accepted to a prestigious college that we thought would be a great fit.</p>
<p>He now says he wants to go to a school with a pretty bad reputation for things that would concern us all. </p>
<p>He broke down in sobs as he fessed up.</p>
<p>I needed to read that he must make the decision even though its the last choice for us.</p>
<p>I realized today I have to toss out the bumper sticker I’d already purchased …</p>
<p>^ Sorry for the heartbreak, but I love your screenname!!</p>
<p>My D has decided on a school and has admitted that she is making the decision based on emotion rather than logic. She refuses to consider all aspects and has her mind made up</p>
<p>It’s not my first choice, but in the end, none of the choices will be wrong. </p>
<p>So now its time for me to let go and trust her decision</p>
<p>I feel that the final decision of making the selection should lie with the child, whatever the case may be. As a parent, we can only suggest our children what to do and what not to do and should only step in if we feel like our child is making a misguided decision.</p>
<p>Like if my D were choosing School A because the party life is better there while she can get School B, which offers better opportunities for her, I would step in and tell her that.</p>
<p>Finally, once my D comes me with a final list, of say, 5 or so colleges, I would do my own research. Yes, cost would be one of the things I would be looking at and if I feel like it would be challenging for me and my wife, I would have to have a talk with my D.</p>
<p>But, costcoholic-- why does he want to go to this school with a bad rep of some kind? He broke down in tears; he must have some honorable reason for going to this school?</p>
<p>This is a great thread. D has been very systematic and objective through this process and is now simply paralyzed deciding between her top two. She wants to study biology and biostatistics. She is job shadowing a genetics counselor and finds that very interesting. She wants to keep her Pre-med option open, study abroad, participate in undergrad research preferably in genetics.</p>
<p>She is between UChicago and the Michigan Honors program (OOS for both).</p>
<p>Chicago: She has been on campus several times and done an overnight. She loves the house system, the beautiful gothic architecture, the focus on the life of the mind, the whole Chicago quirky nerdy package. Quarters appeal to her, she can take more classes.
The Core is a pro and con. She loves the idea of it but really wants to start studying and exploring what she thinks she is interested in.<br>
The cons are safety, one of her early criteria was to be in a college town like Ann Arbor, Bloomington, Providence…Chicago doesn’t have that feel and you are told to be cautious where you go. Cost…a good bit more than even Michigan OOS. Study abroad seems harder to squeeze in with the quarter system and sequencing of Pre med requirements. Much more of a academic or medical school focus…less professional exploration. She is already annoyed with it being confused with U of I Chicago. We have inquired about merit aid and were told if any were issued it would be by April 15.</p>
<p>Michigan: The honors program seems great. Especially living in the Honors Housing on the main campus. Ann Arbor is great. Many opportunities to explore professions. There is a school of public health on campus, an undergraduate research program, a lot of study abroad options that many students seem to take advantage of. The LSA distribution does not seem as intense as the Core and there is a wide variety of classes that meet the different requirements. Michigan seems more generous with AP credit as well.</p>
<p>The cons, she feels like she would be missing out on a very unique Chicago education. She has a few friends and teachers that really think Chicago is amazing and unique, an opportunity that should not be turned down. She has once already declared Michigan was it because it had everything and is back peddling again.</p>
<p>Comments on experiences with either of the two schools appreciated…are our perceptions on target?</p>
<p>Advice on making a tough decision also appreciated.</p>
<p>Our problem is that it’s come down to 2 schools. One came in much higher than the Net Price Calculator estimated, and the other was only applied to as a back up, which she really doesn’t WANT to attend. How do I handle this, my heart is hurting.</p>
<p>You know - tracyann and MomofKat - you may get much more specific advice if you post your own threads with suggestive (not racy!) titles.</p>
<p>I know. Just trying to think of a way to word what seems to be an impossible situation.</p>