I wasn’t sure where to post this, but have you heard of DINKWAD?
I hadn’t. I’m not on TikTok, but heard it mentioned and had to Google it. This is one explanation I found. I confess it made me laugh.
But the more I thought about it, I realized I know quite a few young people in the 25-35 age range who are in that situation. And may I add, a lot of those couples are not necessarily married.
I have no issue with that. At this point in my life I’m just observing and curious how this will all play out in the long term.
LOL. I currently have two DINKWAD’s. Ages 34 and 31. One married, one not. I know that one couple def wants to change the “NK” part eventually. I think the other couple will also…but right now they are content and enjoying the “WAD” part!
This former DINK has one DINKWAD and one who wishes she could be one. (Her job is too demanding for a dog at this time, but she talks about dogs…a lot.) LOL
Another former DINK whose only will be a DINKWAD in June with no intention of losing the NK. They’re very happy and that’s all that matters to me. I’m way too young to be a grandmother anyway, right?
BTW: This term is not new. It was around when we were DINKWACs.
We have three DINKWACs. Two don’t even want dogs. All have cats. Cats allow more travel and freedom than dogs. Only one wants K in the future as far as I know. They’re the ones who have cats and want to get a dog.
I heard of DINKs. In 20th most of them are. When they are in 30th and 40th it’s a different story. I have one grandchild from my DS. DD and her BF in their 20th plan to have 2-3 kids in the future. They both came from families with very strong family ties and want to have traditional family
I refuse to claim any silly relation to any animal I don’t own. And don’t me started on terms like “furbaby,” etc.
From the article, though:
Those who have embraced the DINKWAD, DINK, or SINK lifestyles commonly say that they are drawn to a way of life free from the responsibilities of parenting and financial stress.
DH and I enjoyed this status for 16 of our first 20 years, never intending to have a family. I’ve posted my difficulty with finding myself three months pregnant at 39. Parenthood was a very, very difficult adjustment for me after the freedom and lifestyle of our previous 20 years. I’ve talked to our son about the “baby math” of waiting an extra decade or two before having children, but all he sees is what he experienced, a loving financially stable family with mature parents who had their own lives and didn’t feel the need to vicariously live through or get too involved in his. He thinks he and his fiancée will remain DINKWADs but kids, if they come, will be much later. He doesn’t really understand the consequences of the gap between us where we will not be in his life as long as our parents have been in ours (all four are still alive and well into their late 80s). When he is in his 60s, like we are now, the math says we won’t be here and, in fact, may be gone or infirm when he is in his 40s. If he has children as late as we had him, they likely won’t know us. This is not something he thinks about now as he’s sure we will live forever.
Our DINKS watched our dog for 2 weeks while we were abroad recently - they live in the city and brought our pup everywhere - he experienced his first Farmers’ Market, first bar, etc…I think a dog is in their future:) Hopefully kids someday as well!
I love the DINKWAD’s! I like dogs, but don’t currently own one, and the DINKWAD dogs are usually well-groomed and well-behaved. I get to enjoy the dogs for short spurts without having to take care of them.
I have thought about this a lot. My mom had me when she was 39 and I had my youngest when I was 39. They did get to know her and remember her pretty well. She died at age 87, almost 88, in 2010 when my youngest was 10 and my older one 13. They don’t remember my dad well, though. He was in a nursing home from the time my oldest was 2 in 2003 until his death in 2010. So they didn’t get to know who he really was.
They have a great relationship with my MIL, who is 84 now. She was very present in their lives when they were little and we continue to be close.
I only knew one of my grandparents well. My paternal grandfather died when my dad was a teen and his mom died when I was 4. I just have a vague outline of her. My mom’s dad died when I was 6 months old and my mom’s mom died when I was 14. I believe she was 84. We tend to have wide generations in my family for whatever reason.
Oh, and I have one SINKW2CAD and one in college, so I don’t think she gets a cool acronym yet.
If my kids choose not to have kids I won’t be sad. I just want them to be happy, regardless of what that looks like. They are both still so young and think kids are annoying. I personally wasn’t fond of babies until I had my own.
Pros and Cons of waiting/not waiting to have kids. My parents were young when we were born so I grew up seeing both sides of that. FWIW I have no memories of my maternal grandmother who passed away in her early 40’s. I adored my paternal grandmother, but we lost her when I was in college and she was only 70. Nothing is a sure thing.
When we married at age 23, the plan was to wait 5 years to start a family, but we were both in the middle of career changes at the time and so we waited another 5 years to have D. Son was another 5 years after that so I was about to turn 39 when he was born. No regrets.
Ages 34 and 31. One married, one not. I know that one couple def wants to change the “NK” part eventually. I think the other couple will also…but right now they are content and enjoying the “WAD” part!
