5’10 dad to essentially 6’2 son doesn’t seem that off. Probably some taller genes somewhere. I’m 5’6 with 6’5 and 6’6 sons that tower over me. Husband has very tall genes, but my side of the family was not particularly short either. I was the shortest, mother, sister, father all taller than me.
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Hoggirl - you have the patience of a saint with those MIL comments! She clearly has issues that are making her miserable to say such things! Also, not that it matters, but 5’4" is hardly short!
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I remember those adult height predictors (based on child’s height at a certain age, mom’s and dad’s height) predicted my sister and me to both be 5’4".
I am 5’7" and she is about 5’1". But that averages out to 5’4"!
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Those height predictors got me and my sis/brother perfectly. And also my two kids.
My sister and I look very much alike, except I’m 5-10 and she’s 5-3. My parents are normal height (5-10, 5-6) but one of my grandmothers was 5-9 and grandfather was 6-4. But my other grandma was the tallest in her family at 5-0. You can tell which sides of the family our height/builds came from! She got the bird bones. I got the field worker/surf stock.
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My Dad is 5ft 8.
My mom is 5ft 1.
I’m 5ft 10.
Can’t outrun my genes.
Mom has this annoying habit of pointing out how tall other peoples’ kids are and she likes to point out other peoples’ frames.
I am what I am mom lol.
If I have kids, I need to find someone at least 5ft 4 otherwise my mom is gonna comment on their heights lmao.
Aww, thanks. Yes, she used to be a happier soul, I think.
I should be more patient. Lord only knows what I will be like if and when I make it to 84.
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My mil keeps a constant running commentary on the appearance of others. Height, weight, clothing choices, hairstyles, piercings, whatever. People on TV, people she sees out at restaurants, etc. She is extremely fixated on outward appearance.
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My MIL is the same. I just reprimanded her for calling a friend fat, telling her it’s just wrong. He’s someone we’ve known for years who has always struggled with his weight due to depression. Her rebuttal? “ He looks like a slob”.
Mine : “ You’re just so miserable”. This is usually when my H steps in and tells her to shut it!
I applaud your boldness in calling her out. And your dh for stepping in.
The best I can ever muster is to indignantly say, “First Name!!”
I really think it is a generational thing. Seem to be many in that Silent Generation who focus on outward appearances. They definitely aren’t silent about that!
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Hmmm, as we have drifted OT, I’m wondering if in-law relationships are a deterrent to young folks getting married…
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Many newer generations are taller than their parents because of better childhood nutrition and exercise at an early age. My Chinese daughter is taller than expected because she had much better food than if she had remained in China. She also has perfect ‘American teeth’ (which I paid for!) even though her baby teeth rotted out of her mouth and most had to be pulled. The miracle of fluoride in the water and calcium in her diet.
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With dating app data, several studies have been done about this effect. The UChicago study is the one I see most frequently cited. Copying Table 5.5 Height/Income Tradeoffs from that paper:
| Height | Additional Income Needed by Men ($1000) | Additional Income Needed by Women ($1000) |
|---|---|---|
| 5’ 0” | 317 | -43 |
| 5’ 2” | 269 | -43 |
| 5’ 4” | 221 | -34 |
| 5’ 6” | 175 | 16 |
| 5’ 8” | 138 | Not Feasible |
| 5’ 10” | 24 | Not Feasible |
| 6’ 0” | -8 | Not Feasible |
| 6’ 2” | -30 | Not Feasible |
| 6’ 4” | -51 | Not Feasible |
| 6’ 6” | -63 | Not Feasible |
| 6’ 10” | -63 | Not Feasible |
“Note: The table shows the additional annual income that a man or woman needs to be as successful as a 5’ 11.5’’ tall man or a 5’ 5.5’’ tall woman (the median heights in our online dating population). The baseline incomes are $62,500 for men and $42,500 for women. For example, consider a man who is 5’ 2’’ tall. In order to be as desirable to a woman as a man who is 5’ 11.5’’ tall and who earns $62,500 per year, he needs to have an additional income of $269,000 (i.e., he needs to make $331,500 per year).“
I watched the first episode of Jewish Matchmaker on Netflix last night. (I’m not Jewish.) It is ok, so far, but I’m hoping it delves into the personalities rather than becoming a spectacle just for entertainment value like so many other modern dating shows.
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Well, I just entered all our heights into a calculator and we’re all 99th %ile. I had no idea that all of us would be that high. Dad is 6’9", Mom is 5’10", Son (17) is 6’4", Son (14) is 6’1". Lots of tall folks in both our families, as you might imagine.
Son (17) is praying he doesn’t grow more, and Son (14) is hoping he stops at 6’4" or less like his brother appears to have done. I note that there seems to be a ceiling at 6’6" in that height/income dating table from @OhiBro, beyond which extra height doesn’t give an advantage. I wish there was no advantage at all, as it’s totally unfair and stupid.
Neither spouse nor I paid much mind to potential partner heights while dating. We each would have dated people of basically any height. We both had dated much shorter people in the past, including the maligned taller woman with a shorter man. I recognize that I come from a position of tall privilege, but I find the ranking of people by heights to be really gross.
I feel no sense of pride for having tall sons, any more or less than I would feel if my sons were short (like many of their friends are). Just as I have no particular feelings about their blond hair and blue eyes.
We certainly have no preference whatsoever about what their future partners look like! We’ll just be pleasantly surprised and delighted if either of them ever bring home a partner of any type.
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I would be sad. But I would but my tongue out before I would ever say anything. That’s just the way I roll. It’s their choices. I made mine.
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It’s not just an American thing.
Did your husband get asked if he played basketball a lot? We have a friend, Tom, who is 6’9" and whose dad was a high school basketball coach. Much to his dad’s chagrin Tom was more interested in computers and robotics than sports. He got asked about basketball all the time by random strangers, though, and I think that wore thin. Also, “how’s the weather up there?” People think they are so witty.
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That’s annoying and rude. I would just give those people a blank look and tell them “Gee, I never heard that before. What do you mean?”
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My H and sons have all gotten those kinds of questions about basketball and the weather! But, they did play basketball (and volleyball)!
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A funny story on height across cultures. In grad school, ShawSon started dating a woman who emigrated from China with her parents when she was 7 to a state in the Deep South. When her mother found out that she was dating someone who was not Chinese, she had three questions:
- Is he Jewish? Check. Apparently big bonus points among the Chinese for getting a Jewish husband – did not know that.
- Is he tall? Check. She couldn’t be taller than 5’1" and he could lift her with one arm, so why tall is important, I don’t know. I suspect this follows from evolutionary biology or sociobiology but I really am not sure – taller means a better protector?
- What is he studying? Check. Tech MS and MBA at prestigious university means high earning potential.