<p>Perhaps one of the men on this site can clarify this for me -- am I being asked out here?</p>
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I really liked seeing you again on Friday. We should go out and get dinner soon. my treat of course. (-;
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<p>If so, how do I respond? The guy in question is a sweet guy (and a good friend of a good friend) so I certainly do not want to be rude or hurt his feelings, but I'm not interested in dating him. Honestly, even if I was, I find the facebook aspect of this extremely immature and just plain weird.</p>
<p>One of the things guys need to learn in college is that a phone call is the minimum level of interaction required to ask a girl out. He can get the number over facebook, but then he needs to use it.</p>
<p>One of my friends has only been asked out on Facebook in each of the three relationships she’s been in. Her third and current relationship is going really really well -it’s lasted almost a year. I don’t see anything wrong with it… just another medium in which to socialize with someone/get to know them. </p>
<p>As for the OP, if this guy shows more interest, just tell him off STAT, especially if you consider him a nice person. It’s a horrible feeling to think someone’s interested “in that way” when that’s not the case…</p>
<p>I don’t really see the problem in asking someone on a date over facebook :/</p>
<p>Now, confessing your love to someone should be done in person. Breaking up should also be done in person unless there are circumstances that don’t allow it.</p>
<p>Personally I’d consider going with the guy and telling him there that you’re not interested in him as more than a friend.</p>
Maybe I’m just an oddball, but I think that asking someone out over facebook (especially if you already have that person’s phone number) essentially communicates that you don’t value the relationship enough to make the effort to speak with him/her in person.</p>
<p>“you don’t value the relationship enough to make the effort to speak with him/her in person.”
Or that you are very shy and are afraid or rejection.</p>
<p>even if he did ask you out via phone call, you would still reject him, correct? facebook is more of a low-key/security blanket type of thing…he’s just protecting his feelings. i don’t think it increases the likeliness of rejection…it just cushions the blow.</p>
<p>i don’t even think he was asking to be in a relationship. at most, he was asking for a date. at least, he just wanted to hang out [that could <em>potentially</em> lead to something]. that’s not, like, marriage.</p>
<p>& i don’t think that asking someone to hang out over facebook demonstrates a gross lack of manners. but you’re entitled to your opinion.</p>
<p>I also don’t see how asking someone out via facebook shows a lack of manners. Goodness, they’re just expressing an interest in having dinner with you, not insulting you in any way. Be flattered enough that somebody IS interested in you regardless of how it’s expressed instead of turning everything into a negative.</p>
<p>I agree with DCHurricane by the way, I think you should agree to meet with him but explain to him there that you’re not interested in being anything more than friends.</p>
<p>Go eat with him. If he insists that he pay for your meal, then let him, but don’t let it happen again. If it happens too much then he may not want to be “just friends” anymore. </p>
<p>Its off of Facebook, he just wants to hang out. Maybe he finds you to be good company, I wouldn’t assume that he wants a relationship, unless he tries to pull some aggressive moves on you!!! =P </p>
<p>Be very clear that you don’t want to date him, be direct, don’t fluff it–that may just make it worse…</p>
<p>The purpose of a date is to lead into a relationship (otherwise I would not consider it a date – serial dating is merely meeting up with a lot of acquaintances). So if he is not ready to be in a relationship, I hardly see the purpose of dating at all.</p>
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<p>Lack of respect is insulting. Not holding the door for someone is insulting to them. Why? Because you’re telling them that they’re not worth the effort of etiquette.</p>
<p>I mean, ideally one should do it in person or at least over the phone. But asking someone on a date, which could or could not lead to nothing, is not that serious. Telling someone you truly love them, that you want them to be your girlfriend, that you want to marry them… yeah of course you should do that face-to-face.</p>