<p>That’s a HUGE MYTH about community colleges. Some of the instructors at community colleges are either Doctors/ PhD’s or professors at the 4 year institutions and teach at the community college part-time so she will not be smarter than the professors. These will be the same or similar quality professors that she would have at a 4-year college.</p>
<p>@shanice112 Possibly the major problem with CC for this student is that she would go to a 4-yr school as a transfer, thus losing eligibility for the best FA.</p>
<p>Professors at 4-year schools teach at CC? Really? I doubt it. I’m sure that <em>adjuncts</em> at those schools do. Sure, some schools use a lot of adjuncts, and there are lots of talented PhDs who have to work as adjuncts these days. But really, it all depends on the schools in question.</p>
<p>Even if she audits, it’s something. Since the kid claims to be stymied by not knowing what her major will be, she could certainly experiment at cc, for no credit. Who would know? OP hasn’t been back to tell us what expectations they set. </p>
<p>In my area, I’d say it was about half PhDs and most others have an MS at least, unless they have a trade certificate of some sort, in terms of teaching at CCs.</p>
<p>YMMV where you live. I am in the NYC suburbs.</p>
<p>I truly believe you made the right choice in allowing your daughter to come home. Please don’t be so hard on yourself. I am in the same boat. My son graduated last May and decided to stay home for a year. He received full scholarship offers to U of I and CU Boulder and still did not want to go anywhere. He said he was not ready. I had to listen to him. It scares the heck out of me because who knows if he will receive the same offers this year. But I figured it was better to take the chance than to have him call or text me everyday telling me how miserable he was. Because summer is over and his girlfriend is back in school, I am insisting he gets a job in addition to practicing his cello. It is hard not to baby him and treat him like an adult now that he is 18 but I know I have to do it. It sounds like your daughter just needs some room to grow up and figure things out. But she should not lay around all day and wait for the Skype sessions with the boy. </p>
<p>On another note, I went to college at 17 and was not ready. It took me seven years to get a four-year degree. On the upside, when I was ready to learn, I did very well and went on to earn a JD and was at the top of my class. Just give your daughter some time. </p>
<p>Lastly, being in love and navigating “teenage-love” is also a HUGE learning experience. Whether it works out with her boyfriend or not, she will grow as a person from the experience. Lessons are learned in more places than just the classroom.</p>
<p>Shanice, as a college professor I have to tell you, you are wrong there. no myth. No tenured or tenure track faculty at a 4 year college teaches in CC. Maybe some instructors and adjuncts, but not as many as you think.</p>
<p>Oh, I don’t know. There are faculty here, tenured faculty, who teach at the local cc during the summer, but not during the school year. </p>
<p><a href=“http://raritanval.catalog.acalog.com/content.php?catoid=5&navoid=222”>http://raritanval.catalog.acalog.com/content.php?catoid=5&navoid=222</a></p>
<p>Maybe not half, but more than a few at the above CC near me. They are full-time as far as I know, not adjuncting from a 4-year 10-month job in the summer.</p>
<p>Given the requirements of a tenure track-tenured job of both research and teaching I honestly doubt it. The benefit in pay would be minimal relative to the time it would take.</p>
<p>None of the people in the list you included say they work full time at a 4 year university. Some have PhDs, yes, not the majority, but a few. That’s different from saying CCs have the same professors that a 4 year college has.</p>
<p>I disagree with the advice for her to get a job. I think the wiser course would be to get her into community college/local college (whatever is currently available) classes right away. As someone else mentioned, she can then transfer over to the boyfriend’s college if she wants to, so she can look at it as the ticket to get there, and meanwhile be earning college credit for whatever she decides to do. My concern with the job plan is that it is all too easy to fall into the trap of starting to make some money, maybe enough that an immature person (I was one was lol) might think they can afford to move out, then they HAVE to work, then they can’t afford to go to school…once in the work force, it can be hard to leave.</p>
<p>Be aware that CC will make her a transfer student for admittance purposes and FA. Can’t recall what her financial aid situation was or if she managed to withdraw. </p>
<p>She didn’t get enough FA to attend the BF’s college, although she was accepted. At least that is my recollection. So going to CC would effectively torpedo her chances of being able to afford any of the schools in question.</p>
<p>I seem to recall that about a year ago this girl had a huge run in with an orchestra director that caused he mother to come here and ask whether they should make her quit playing the cello and sign up for AP math instead. (Before that, the girl was practicing 6 hours a day for a show and developed an injury of some sort, and the mother wanted her to pull out of the final performance.) By quitting, she would be giving up the opportunity to go to All-State. I guess she quit, because there was a thread about fire-saling her $5K cello for $1K. Now she’s had a huge run-in with an apparently lunatic roommate and mother, and has pulled out of college.</p>
<p>Could be wrong, but I sense a pattern here.</p>
<p>Again, at cc she could audit or go no credit, no paper trail, to tackle the other hurdle the kid claimed: that she can’t figure out what her major interests may be. Or then rule out some subject or two. The longer she waits,classes may be closed, that door shut.</p>
<p>But again, we’re not hearing what the parents are trying to hold her to. Only that it’s wearing on OP. </p>
<p>Actually, at this point, we are talking amongst ourselves. The OP has left the room.</p>
<p>There is a pattern here.</p>
<p>I have not totally abandoned the thread. It just got overwhelming. The 2nd roommate, who my husband and I thought was so nice, turned out to be in to meth. It made me step back and question everything. I felt she should have stayed. But the school is very small. My older child still goes there and this came out about the meth. </p>
<p>She started counseling. My husband and I have decided that even if we came up with the money for her to join her boyfriend at college, we won’t pay it. Here is the thing about the boyfriend…he is a religious fundamentalist. We are not. She lets him believe she goes to church all the time. She actually only goes when she is going with him. I feel she is misleading him because he is a good escape. </p>
<p>There are so many problems with the whole situation that at this point, I do not feel I am in good judgement to make any calls on anything at all. I am going to let the counselor sort things out for now before we act on anything. That is it. That is where everything is.</p>
<p>LMK- big hugs to you and a pat on the back for getting your D counseling.</p>
<p>One day at a time.</p>
<p>LMK Wow, just wow. That’s what I’d call a rough college start.</p>
<p>I sincerely hope therapy helps your daughter, and that things get better soon. One day at a time.</p>
<p>Hoping this counselor is seeing the whole family. </p>
<p>Hope it all gets sorted out.</p>
<p>Yow. Best wishes and thanks for checking in. Good she’s in counseling, now consider maybe some for yourself, since this is weighing so heavily on you. It can help- most important, it can be a breather with a neutral party.</p>