Girlfriend issues

<p>I know it's pathetic that I'm using a college forum for advice, but trust me, I'm that desperate. Anyways, the story is, my girlfriend is completely ignoring me. She doesn't like talking about it, and the only reason she gives me is that she doesn't feel comfortable around me anymore...for no apparent reason. She claims that it's all her, and that she's crazy when it comes to relationships. As shallow as it seems, it really does hurt me...because I like her so much. Anyone that can offer advice is appreciated...espeically girls, since I have no idea what goes on in your heads.</p>

<p>She might just need space. Are you together with her often? Try giving her some time alone and maybe she will come around and be comfortable with you again.</p>

<p>Maybe...she's an odd one for sure.</p>

<p>Let’s see … You really didn’t give enough info to make a sure analysis, but it’s very possible she just wants space like Legendofmax said. She could also just be tired of the relationship and wants to move on. Another thing to consider … I took a quick look at your past posts and it appears that you live in Indiana and will attend Cornell in the fall. Where is she going? Maybe she doesn’t want to have a LDR and would rather just go ahead and end it now. Maybe you're Cornell material and she's not? That could make her feel inferior and thus uncomfortable. At any rate, it looks like she certainly needs to work on her communication skills!</p>

<p>Funny, because she will be a communications major at DePauw.</p>

<p>Anyways, last time I checked she still liked me. This is the first time she's been in a relationship, and I think she's freaking herself out. She doesn't like the idea of having obligations, and feeling responsible for whenever I'm upset, etc. It started out great...everyone thought she had changed and gotten over her fears, but I guess it's starting to come back, and she's going into her shell again.</p>

<p>Just buy her fowers and a card....that usually work wonders with girls.....</p>

<p>My first instinct was to tell you to break up with her before you end up getting hurt...but i dunno...girls are complicated...I've gone through something ALMOST like this before...ish...not totally, but if you two really care about eachother, then it'll work out....try talking to her less, act like yourself..don't act like you think something's wrong....hope for the best, but be prepared for the worst....has something happened recently?...like some kind of conflict between you two, or have you started doing things with eachother that you hadn't before?..has anything just been different?...if you can evaluate, we might be able to help you a little bit.</p>

<p>She's dumping you, but (being how it's her first relationship) she doesn't know how to go about it - no "if's," "and's," or "but's" about it.</p>

<p>In a twist of ironic fate, she broke up with me about three hours ago...I've never been so upset in my life, waterworks, etc. She says that she wants to be comfortable around me again, and that she wants to be good friends again. We'll see...thanks for all the support, guys.</p>

<p>told ya...</p>

<p>Sorry to hear about that, PerfectFourth. I'm sure you'll meet somebody great at Cornell.</p>

<p>Ah, Maize ... Ever the "compassionate conservative ..."</p>

<p>sorry bout that.</p>

<p>atleast Maize didn't beat around the bush...</p>

<p>You will meet someone else. Most high school relationships weren't meant to last!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll feel better soon.</p>

<p>I'm truly sorry, PerfectFourth. But keep in mind that you have the rest of the summer to relax and Cornell to look forward to in the fall.</p>

<p>I wrote a poem for my friend when his girlfriend of a year broke up with him. It sounds silly but I hope it helps.</p>

<p>Intrinsic Vehemence</p>

<p>If I could
I would </p>

<p>Take the pain away
And bleach clean the gray
I would chase away the demons in your head
And fill it with bliss instead </p>

<p>I would scream out the anger you feel
And soothe your shattered heart and heal </p>

<p>I would give you my blood and sweat and bare my soul
And if it’s fear I unfold, it’s your hand I’ll hold </p>

<p>I would revive your hope and faith if they were about to die
And if u push me away at first, I won’t b pushed away at 2nd try </p>

<p>I would break off pieces of my soul if it’d stop your hurt
And it you’re 2 far away I’d overnight it 2 thousand miles apart </p>

<p>I would
If I could </p>

<p>I would give my tears, all the healing liquid in me that remains
And if your demons made you reject it, I’d inject it str8 2 your veins </p>

<p>U might think I say this
Halfhearted, and only because it’s impossible to kiss
Away so much pain </p>

<p>I know that I can never slay away this much pain
And I can’t protect you from this much rain </p>

<p>But I can write a poem with words & emotions
And bury my soul in it
And if you, for a second, doubt it, let me reassure you
Love is infinite</p>

<p>"Cornell to look forward to in the fall"</p>

<p>Cornell=more pain (academic pain)</p>

<p>i know i have been late to give you the advise, but anywayz, i hqave been on her steps. Im sure your girl have some feelings for someone else, and the moments she was quiet with you, is cuz she was confused. The reason might be, is that she didnt had any relationship experience, and she wants to learn more, especially if yall dont do enough around. For instance, yall dont go out much, or dont talk that much, or else you might have rush your relationship, and she feels overwhelmed, frustrated, and she needed space. I will post and email i have received a while ago, of course it is not for me, cus im a girl, but after readiong it, I do totally have agreed with him. I know cuz im a girl.</p>

<p>Cornell: best of luck in the coming months. You won't believe me now, but you'll completely realize that I'm right in a year... but the relationship would not have lasted once you went off to school. For the first semester, everyone's friends and significant others are at home. Once you go home for Christmas break, you realize that your life is at school - and people break up with their significant others and start dating people at college. </p>

<p>Again, good luck. :)</p>

<p>lies lies lies...all lies!....my girlfriend and i were away from eachother during the school-year...she was here and i was in blacksburg, and we made it just fine...doing just as good as we were if not better.</p>

<p>A Special Offer For Single Men Only...
The Ten Most Dangerous
Mistakes YOU Probably
Make With Women
And What To Do About It...</p>

<p>Here Are The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With WomenAnd How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common Mistakes...</p>

<p>MISTAKE #1: Being
Too Much Of A Nice Guy</p>

<pre><code> Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted "nice" guys?

Of course you have.

Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.

What's going on here?

It's actually very simple...

Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.

And guess what?

Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION.

And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you.

I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT... but GET OVER IT.

Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.
</code></pre>

<p>MISTAKE #2: Trying To
Convince Her To Like You</p>

<pre><code> What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like... but she's just notinterested?

Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.

Well, I have news for you... YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!

Never, ever, EVER.

You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning".

Think about it.

If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her?

But we all do it.

When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.

Bad idea. One that will never work.
</code></pre>

<p>MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her
For Approval Or Permission</p>

<pre><code> In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission".

Another HORRIBLE idea.

Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them... EVER.

Don't get me wrong here.

You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you.

But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again.

You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.

Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her...
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<p>MISTAKE #4: Trying To Buy Her Affection With Food And Gifts</p>

<pre><code> How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did?

If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.

Well guess what?

It's only NATURAL when this happens...

That's right, I said NATURAL.

When you do these things, you send a clear message:
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<p>"I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".</p>

<pre><code> Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.
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<p>MISTAKE #5: Sharing
How You Feel Too Early In
The Relationship With Her </p>

<pre><code> Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.

Attractive women are rare.

And they get a LOT of attention from men.

Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE TIME.

An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translate into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.

And guess what?

Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men.

That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.

They know what to expect.

And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.

This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.

Don't do it. Lean back. Relax.

There's a much better way...
</code></pre>