<p>So, a lot of us have done the big move in/ tearful goodbye session already and are back home by now. Others will be joining us soon. I thought it might be fun to start a thread to report how our DS and DDs are doing. Are they happy with their choice? Regrets? Biggest problems? Best thing that has happened to them, etc....</p>
<p>My D is at the University of Miami studying Marine Bio and has taken to it like a duck to water! She LOVES it there and is so happy.</p>
<p>Biggest change: She was an absolute slob at home and has transformed instantly into a neat freak. Shocked the heck out of us!</p>
<p>Best thing to happen: They are taking the Marine School kids on a snorkeling trip to the coral reef off Key Biscayne tomorrow. I am jealous!!!</p>
<p>I miss her, but am sure she made the right choice.</p>
<p>That must such a relief! We want our children to be safe and happy in the world out there.</p>
<p>Next year I will be in your shoes and hoping my son will be the same. After reading your post about the U of Miami, (I think it was your post) I went and looked over their website for CS/Math that my son would be interested in. </p>
<p>While very happy with his school selection, classes and roommates, DS thinks everyone else is adjusting slightly better than he. Which is a little funny because many of my friends relate their students all have the same report.
It’s all so new, and he misses his brothers. “Give it time” I say to him… and to myself.</p>
<p>SVMMom when they are so happy you do get jealous don’t you. DD loves her school so much and is in such a perfect fit that I was jealous, too, and wanted to go there Not that homesickness didn’t hit occasionally. So be prepared, it still could. But she knew she was happy there and it pulled her out of it pretty quickly when it happened.</p>
<p>Our son took a laissez-faire approach to packing (just tossed a few clothes and the laptop in the suitcase an hour before leaving) and we used the natural consequences method of teaching (i.e. let him do this). On arrival, we went to Walmart to buy hangers and an ethernet cable but he thought he was good otherwise. Now (a week after arrival) it has occurred to him he could actually use some school supplies!! Luckily, he thinks he can find someone to give him a ride back to Walmart to buy notebooks and things. He also decided he needs a printer after handing in a hand-written English paper and being told that won’t fly. His immediate fix for that will be to buy a flash drive and use campus printers. We can bring him a printer when we see him for a football game. (We have several sitting unused in a closet, including the one his brother used at college.) I’m letting him have total ownership of the process and make his own mistakes. I think it makes him feel great to solve these little problems on his own, one step at a time. </p>
<p>Overall, he likes his classes. In particular, he likes that they are short and focused. He was bored with classes in high school and hasn’t had that problem so far in college. The social life is awesome, but he knew that would be the case.</p>
<p>First week of classes are over and D seems to be doing very well. She has called quite a few times (somewhat surprising), but usually for very specific things/questions. She called last night when she was walking to a friend’s dorm (I think to kill time) and I thanked her for thinking of me, and she said – well, I tried [best friend from home] first but she didn’t answer. haha She said she hardly thinks about home – which I told her was good since that probably meant she was having a great time there. Is having a bit of a challenge adapting to college meal schedule (she is not a three meals a day at specific times sort of kid.) Likes her classes a lot. Seems to be managing the work load well. Meeting a ton of new friends. So far, so good.</p>
<p>My son is adjusting well. Found some great friends. Roommate is a video game player (all the time) which is a bit annoying but as my son said “I don’t plan to spend college in my room”, so he will adjust.</p>
<p>He is going to the freshman orientation activities unwillingly and thinks they are lame, but is otherwise quite happy.</p>
<p>Classes start on Monday so I will be very interested to see how he feels next weekend.</p>
<p>I liked the “realer” concept. I learned a long time ago that life is just life no matter where you are…</p>
Who knows? Have yet to actually “talk” to him in person, and tomorrow is the 1 week mark. He and I have texted and emailed about things he forgot (cables, slpitters, etc.) and needs (SS card & birth certificate for ROTC), but have yet to speak. H saw him the other day, but, for me, that doesn’t count. I told S at drop-off I need to hear his voice at least once a week or I’ll be embarrassing him big time by showing up in person. Time will tell …</p>
<p>We just dropped off our girls on Thursday but if the adage “they only get in touch when something is wrong.” is accurate they are having a fabulous time at this weekend of welcome. Got a staus update from one on FB and the other made a comment on mine but other than that and a couple of one word text messages we have no clue what’s going on. Feels weird and quiet and a little sad but right all at the same time.</p>
<p>All was well and happy with my s until 3 days after we left him, when he became ill with a flare of his Crohn’s disease. He has had no solid food for 2 days. That risk was the one reason I was reluctant to have him choose the farthest away school, but their health center has been great with long distance new meds called for him by his MD here. We will see how it goes; it surely has thrown a curve ball into his ability to enjoy his first week of classes, meet new people, etc. He is a stoic and not a stressed type of kid, so reading his reactions is tough long distance. I am so sorry for him that this happened so soon into his new life, but that IS life with this disease. Since he won’t be 18 for a few months, I have not had to deal with the privacy laws with info to and from the health center.</p>
<p>I am trying to be hands off as much as possible, but I admit I checked out flights just in case he needs hospitalization. Praying, praying, praying!</p>
<p>On the other hand…
We dropped our son off at his ED dream school a week ago and have been talking with him regularly, not a good sign, as historymom said. He loves the physical setting of his school, Wake Forest, gets along great with his roommate, has made friends, and likes his classes. The problem? He has discovered that the rumors that many at the school are not welcoming to kids who do not fit their ideal are justified. Coming from a large poly-glot area this is not acceptable to him. We are encouraging him to continue to give the school a chance, but he is also actively looking into transferring asap. We are very sad, but also keep telling him that maybe this is just a small minority…</p>
<p>galwaymom so sorry to hear of the flare up of your son’s illness. </p>
<p>kinderteacher. Your advice is good. Have him hang in there. There have to be like mindsd students there. A good place to find them may be in the service oriented clubs.</p>
<p>I am so sorry about your son. I will keep him in my prayers. Please update us as to how he is doing.</p>
<p>On another note…</p>
<p>My D is also very happy with the change in intensity of her classes at college. She was always so frustrated with the slow pace and busy work. I tried to tell her what a difference there was between HS and College and I do not think she believed me. I would tell her of filling 10 pages full of notes in a 1 hour class and my hand cramping up from writing so fast. I think she thought I was exaggerating! Now she knows better!</p>
<p>DD likes her roommate and has found some new friends but is intensely homesick and overwhelmed. Was crying on the phone for an hour earlier and I’m going to see her next weekend as I had to leave a vehicle there due to a sudden mechanical problem. I’m hoping she’ll feel better by then and will not want to come home for the weekend…classes start tomorrow and I’m sure that’s a contributing factor. She’s worried she won’t find the right buildings (it is a very large campus), won’t be able to keep up (I’m sure this is not going to be the case), etc. and has not been able to sleep well or eat more than a bite or two since we left her on Friday. I told her to have a good cry, take a nap, and then go see friends. Fingers crossed…I’m sure she’ll be fine but I may have to go do the same!</p>
<p>Kinderteacher, I can relate to your story. Our older son had the same reaction to a private school in VA (it was his dream school). After about 6 wks, he called to let us know that he was filling out transfer applications for the following Fall. The only thing that got him through his freshman year was knowing that he had transfer acceptances in hand and options to get the heck out of there. Picked him up at the end of freshman year and he immediately tossed everything that he owned with the logo of that school in the trash. He started at a new school for his sophomore year and loved it from the moment he stepped foot on campus. He’ll graduate in the Spring and his only regret is that he didn’t transfer out of his “dream” school right after that first semester.</p>
<p>Thank you so much ny…we are agonizing for him, encouraging him to keep trying while investigating if it’s possible to transfer for the spring. There are so many positives at his school that he will not find anywhere else but ultimately he has to be happy and know that he fits in…</p>
<p>Kinderteacher- my son will be a senior at Wake Forest, born and bred N.J. boy. He has had the greatest time at Wake- made lots of friends from very diverse backgrounds. I hope your son learns from the nice roommate and the friends he has already found about how nice a place Wake is- and not from rumors about a “Wake ideal” -if that were true, we would not have met his many friends of different religions and areas, including India, Saudia Arabia, Canada, Maine, Long Island and the very nice North Carolina Baptist boys he counts among his closest friends. Best of luck.</p>
<p>Good to hear, nj. While the lack of diversity and the looks he has gotten when he says he is Jewish are most troubling, that is not his only complaint, just the one he knows that his dad and I will sympathize with. He is also upset that there isn’t a whole lot going on except for the frat scene. I keep telling him to wait until sports and clubs are going strong. And his roommate absolutely hates it, which can’t be helping matters any. But I will remain hopeful that things will improve, because it is a beautiful school and the people that we met were all very friendly and his classes are small and good…</p>
<p>Kinderteacher: hang in there. Encourage him to focus on his academics and shoot for a strong gpa. This will give him options if he does decide to send out transfer applications. Also encourage him to get to know some of his professors–go to office hours even if it’s just to say hello and talk. Not only will he need professor recs for transfer applications, but the professors can be a great resource during the transition phase.</p>
<p>Give it some time. Be encouraging and try to let him handle things on his own. Try not to react to his venting. In a few weeks, he may have a different outlook about the school. The only suggestion I would make is that if he is considering the idea of a possible transfer, he should send a couple of applications out sooner rather than later. This will give him options in the Spring or Fall.</p>
<p>Thanks again, ny. This is exactly what we said to him earlier, and he is very good at establishing relationships with his teachers. His schedule is not that heavy so he should do well.(hopefully!!) We are also concerned about the possibility of having housing difficulties if he transfers for spring. I almost feel that he is starting to like it more but has his mind set that he doesn’t want to stay. I’m hoping that he will turn around and decide to stay, but he’s already looked at the online apps and knows what he has to do to apply…</p>
Not that homesickness didn’t hit occasionally. So be prepared, it still could. But she knew she was happy there and it pulled her out of it pretty quickly when it happened.</p>