<p>Re contacting–we said goodbye Sunday and have received one e-mail only since then. DH and I are restraining each other to keep from helicoptering, trying so hard to give DS space. The one e-mail said things were going great. Must control urge to call!!!</p>
<p>After we said good bye to D on a Thursday evening, we had about 3 text messages over the course of the next week; all upbeat, but pretty short. I didn’t find it easy, but resisted the urge to text, IM, call – I’m not exactly sure why, though.</p>
<p>Then after a week we got a call about laundry; after that, 3 longish Skypes in 4 days, in part just to chat, in part to tell us things, a few inquiries. </p>
<p>Don’t know what I would have done had she not broken radio silence, so to speak.</p>
<p>My DEAR husband kept telling me that all 3 of us would feel better once we settled into routine, and he was right. My D seems much more upbeat with a week and a half of classes and work under her belt, and we fell right back into our work routines as well and that’s been a blessing. We don’t contact her, but wait for her to contact us, and we’re hearing less and less, a good thing. Just today she texted that she’s joined one of the dance groups (actually I knew about it 2 days ago from watching her facebook, but didn’t ask her about it). She’s danced since she was 3, and a studio is going to feel like a little bit of home to her.</p>
<p>LasMa great news. I had been wondering how your DD was faring. If you noticed my posts, missing her dance studio was the only thing that really seemed to upset my DD…
glad yours is doing better.</p>
<p>So glad kids seem to be adjusting now from seeing these more upbeat posts!
My s’s illness is under control for the most part now, thanks to an amazing response from his school’s health center, and new docs communicating with his specialist here. Since my s is a stoic to the nth degree, I get minimal contact, but I can see that he is at least getting food now from the declining balance on his meal points! That’s an oddly reassuring bit of info, lol.</p>
<p>Hopefully, the good news will keep coming for all of our new freshmen.</p>
<p>So how are all the parents doing with their kids out of the nest? I am a first time college mom and find that the first one gone is hard, but somewhere in me I know she is in the right place w/ the right people. I’m still feeling empty, so am hoping this feeling wears off before parent’s weekend so I don’t appear desparate! : )</p>
<p>Snowflake VT- My oldest daughter has been at college about a month. We are so very proud of her and happy she is at her first choice U. I was in a store last week and a little toddler ran up to her mommy. She reminded me so much of my d with curly golden hair. I actually started crying in the store! … painful lump-in-throat crying. I really miss her! Those 18 years sure flew by! Every once in a while, I’ll step into her now-spotless room and straighten something, just to feel close to her 
(BTW - I’m a strong, capable business woman with 2 other great kids …(no “helicopter”-parent)</p>
<p>At the same time, I’m getting a little concerned that she calls almost everyday. (Opposite problem of many parents here.) I’m happy she feels such love and connection with us, and she’s not miserable or such. She is just still adjusting. I’ve decided there is no reason she’d have to transition “cold turkey” and I know the calls will subside. </p>
<p>I guess we worry when they don’t call and worry when they do too often. The debth of love we parents have for our children is never-ending.</p>
<p>Worry when they don’t call and worry when they do too often. </p>
<p>Yep.</p>
<p>I used to worry when my D was out and worry when she wasn’t…Is it just mothers? My husband doesn’t seem concerned ever. “No news is good news.” Or, “No big deal, let’s just figure it out.” </p>
<p>Worry free.</p>
<p>lol -I worry when my D is out and worry whe she isn’t. I do that too!</p>
<p>I’ve gotten texts that she was heading to a fraternity party at 11 on a Thurs night. . . I take a deep breath & text back “have fun - be safe.” I’ve also gotten a call on a weekend night that she was in her dorm room, and I’m thinking she should be out!</p>
<p>I think it’s just moms-</p>
<p>Galwaymom, hope your son is doing well. One of my son’s teachers suffered with Crohn’s his entire life. What an inspiraton to the boys. </p>
<p>Don’t worry. He will be fine. </p>
<p>We’re keeping you in our prayers.</p>
<p>So glad to read this thread! I thought I was the only one: “worry when they are out [socializing]/worry when they are in [studying].” I thought I was some bizarre, ‘never satisfied’ parent, lol. Glad to see I’m not alone! Ditto on the husband’s reaction: “He’ll be fine. He’s a great kid. Don’t worry. He’ll learn.” Okaaaay. All true. Still. </p>
<p>I also had a very hard time resisting the urge to call son repeatedly the first few weeks (he’s now been there a month). I told a friend – she said: “call me when you get the impulse to call him & I’ll tell you to ‘step away from the phone.’” lol</p>
<p>“Step away from the phone.”</p>
<p>Yesterday I was busy actively NOT calling my daughter, though she finally called when she was doing laundry. (Doing laundry! Imagine.) :)</p>
<p>No, but I wanted to leave the phone home so I would stop checking it while I was at younger D’s soccer game but I was afraid I might miss a call. </p>
<p>LOL</p>
<p>My oldest son has been gone about a month - is absolutely in love with his life on campus and just thrilled to be at his “dream school”. He “checks-in” about 3-4 times a week, mostly via text. I miss the daily conversations with him and I too have to curb my urge to text or call. Its not easy.</p>
<p>Doame- Most of my friends with daughters receive at least one daily phone call and several of them hear from their girls 2-3 times daily! Don’t worry too much - sounds like its maybe just more common with girls.</p>
<p>I have probably heard from my D more in the past 2 weeks than I have from my S in the past 2 years! D is fine - the calls seem quite natural actually. On Friday afternoon, we thumbed through the latest Anne Taylor Loft catalog. No big adjustment really. I hope it lasts!</p>
<p>woody, that sounds very similar to the calls/computer based chats I’ve had with my D. She’s really good at sending the electronic links to clothing she “needs”!</p>
<p>My nephew, a very independent young man, calls my sister everyday. He is not having problem adjusting, my sister is not asking him to call. I think he calls because he is so used to talk to his parents everyday when he lived at home, it’s perfectly nature for him to call when he has time to just let them what his day. He does the usualy thing of calling my sister to find out how to get from the DC train station to Georgetown to visit his girlfriend (while he is on the train already). I am sure it will taper off after a while, but right now it is perfectly nature for him to continue his daily talks with his parents.</p>
<p>Okay, it’s happened. There tearful phone call. Odessagirl is homesick and stir-crazy to get off campus. Luckily from CC I knew not to overreact. Told her we would talk again today. Give it 24 hours, etc. She is only an hour and 15 minutes away. This afternoon we decided that I would get to campus after her last class tomorrow afternoon and take her out and give her a little TLC as only Momma can. I hate it that she is having a rough time, but cannot wait to see her! It’s like when she would be home from school sick. I never wanted her to be sick, but loved having her home with me. That same type of feeling happening.</p>
<p>Not a freshman anymore, but had to let folks know that i just got a text from my D who had a rough start last year,. She gave me an opening to compare his year to this time last year and she “said”</p>
<p>Kinda miss you and dad and I just had some gelato (?) but I was just telling (besties) how totally and completely in love this this year I am.I love (EC) and I love (EC); my classes rock, I have friends everywhere and it’s not cold yet!</p>
<p>It DOES get better!</p>
<p>Good to hear, Shrinkrap!</p>
<p>poetgrl–I like this: “Yesterday I was busy actively NOT calling my daughter…”</p>
<p>Yes, it takes an affirmative effort at will not to call/text. Though I had a 20 min call w/son yesterday – that was a real treat. I did hear about a few concerns (can’t sleep). It’s like you said eddieodessa—you hate that they are not doing perfectly in any aspect, but when it brings about a parent connection, you feel – guiltily – a little good…</p>
<p>My son appears happy. We have been talking as we need to get the accommodations that were planned but are not fully in place. He doesn’t have audio versions of readings yet and we’ve been working on short term technology fixes, but the school is planning to produce these. [We thought they would happen sooner, but they waited until he chose his courses (makes sense) and until he met with the person in charge even though she knew his courses a few days earlier (makes less sense)]. So, he’s called me most every day on functional stuff. Not lots of chit chat about what’s happening, but a little around the edges. He’s picked two activities, ultimate frisbee and debate and is doing both with work a first priority (e.g., likely to skip an ultimate tournament this weekend; don’t know what will happen with the debate tournament this weekend). He’s gone to parties. But he’s clearly working hard.</p>
<p>He did call a) wondering how to get money (2+ weeks into school); and b) to see if I could get textbooks and some other things cheaper than he’d be able to do so at school (answer yes).</p>