<p>Lalah, thank you for sharing your story with us and I’m sorry that you’ve experienced such pain. Look at it like this: so far your parents have written your story, for good or bad, but the rest of your story is really up to you. You get to decide how it plays out. You can succeed and be happy.</p>
<p>My husband does not come from an Asian family but his family life was always difficult. His father struggled with alcoholism and his parents divorced after 25 years of marriage when he was 16 years old. He came from a family of 5 boys; he was the second youngest and the youngest was only 11 when his parents split. The youngest boy stayed with his mom. Because my H is soft hearted and did not want his dad to be alone, he chose to go with his dad. His mom never forgave him for that…to this day. His parents gave him nothing for college, no support at all, financially or otherwise. He survived by going to a state uni on Stafford loans and working two jobs, one late at night after classes stocking groceries. Yes, his grades suffered because he had to work to support himself, but he graduated (although it took him an extra year). He’s never had anything in his life given to him but he’s quite successful anyway and proud to have earned it all himself. Despite the way his story began. I admire him so much for all he accomplished despite the odds and along the way he developed the work ethic that has brought the success that he’s seen.</p>
<p>You can’t control your parents, their feelings, their history, or their issues but you can work hard and change the rest of your story so that one day you’ll have children of your own perhaps and you can make the beginning of their story different.</p>
<p>Good luck to you. Take care of yourself. I know you can do this because you’ve made it this far in a difficult situation. That’s something to be proud of right there. Don’t let anybody tell you that it’s your fault or it can’t be done. Just find a way to get where you want to be.</p>