I have asked to stay w/my older, adult son when visiting his area (younger daughter is also in that area at college). It’s a plane flight for me and not having to pay for a hotel for multiple nights (expensive area) makes it so much more affordable plus I cherish that time w/my son.
I would never assume though - I always triple check to see if he is okay w/it, if he has other plans, etc. Also I make sure to pay him (extra) for gas for driving me places while there and at least 1-2 meals out (and offer to do chores while there - I’ve done yard weeding! ). But he is staying in a large, 3 bedroom house with two bathrooms so it’s do-able that way (some separation and privacy).
We also always do lots to help out around the house when staying with S and DIL - besides helping to take care of the baby we do dishes, empty dishwasher, some cooking, fold laundry, and H will cut the grass. We also give them money to cover all groceries for the week.
My parents were immigrants who were extremely frugal–even when they didn’t have to be so frugal. They would never pay to stay somewhere when one of their children had a place where they could stay for free–even if staying there was inconvenient for the children. Telling them that it was inconvenient to stay at my home would be the same as if I were to say I never wanted to speak to them again and cut off all ties.
My in laws called, they want to travel to a funeral and really can’t do it in a day, can they stay with us tonight?
No way we could say no.
But we are getting ready for a vacation out of the country in a week. We are trying to get a lot of things done before being gone. Also lots of normal doctor appointments have been scheduled. My husband set up a meeting that’s 3 hours from our house today. That we can’t get out of.
The house is a mess, I figured I would have the weekend to plan and clean.
The weather has been gorgeous so we’ve been taking long walks everyday.
There is literally very little food in the house because duh, we are leaving in less than a week.
And because my in laws are increasingly unsteady on their feet, we’ve decided they must sleep in our first floor primary bedroom, instead of climbing the stairs for our clean guest room.
Cleaned the bedroom and bathroom, washed sheets.
and decided to take a long walk! I’m in no way ready for guests and will be gone all day. It will be ok. It’s inconvenient for sure but sometimes you just can’t say no.
Our S and his fiancée just rented a brand new2 bedroom condo in NY. D is already planning on when is best to visit! It’s steps from the subway and has a gorgeous view.
S’s buddy from college is renting the house right next door to us. The buddy has already offered the guest room for S and fiancée if they prefer instead of our home. S noted the friend has A/C and we don’t! We will see what S and fiancée decide.
). But he is staying in a large, 3 bedroom house with two bathrooms so it’s do-able that way (some separation and privacy).