thinking of transferring already...

<p>Do be sure to check with the other schools that accepted you, if they are ones you would like to transfer to. Some of the colleges that accepted my son--but which he did not choose to attend--indicated to him that they would keep his file open for one year. Thus if he changed his mind within a year, he would not have to reapply, but would be automatically accepted. (I don't know how financial aid would be affected, but you can ask.)</p>

<p>^
^
Ignore that.... I left my computer on for hours and pressed Send without realizing that tons of posts might've been posted since the first page... :)</p>

<p>Your case seems very strong and I can TOTALLY relate with you in terms of feeling "trapped." I went to Smith, in "middle of nowhere" in western MA. It's 45 minutes away from the nearest airport but there are no direct flights to my home in upstate NY (would fly through Philly) and they're really expensive. The train is 10 hours (go down to NYC and back up) and bus is 13 hours. As for driving, I did not have a car and hardly anyone drove to/through my hometown on regular basis (actually i found out JUST after my spring break LOL- too late by then) BLEH! Now I am still "in middle of nowhere" but it's much easier drive. 2 hours and my parents are happy to lend me a car if I need it on campus.</p>

<p>I think it's so important to have an easy route out no matter where you are to your bedroom at home- there is no reason to feel trapped. Even if you've been to summer camps and summer programs, going to college is completely different. I'm trying to emphasize this to my brother who's a junior that's nice to be away from parents but you don't want to be so far away in terms of transportation access.</p>

<p>my D experienced severe homesickness at 14 her first year of boarding school. She was actually ill (I guess that's why its called homesickness) and would leave class and go the nurse. She also cried herself to sleep every night. We lived 45 minutes away and the first two weekends, we brought her home. At the beginning of the third week, the school officials begged us to leave her be for the upcoming weekend. They said "3 weeks is a charm", and so we left her there. Believe me, there were some heartwrenching phone calls.</p>

<p>But, magically, after that third weekend, something happenened and we were lucky to get a phone call for the next 4 years.</p>

<p>We just dropped daughter off across the country to begin college. We were shocked when only 5 hours after the drop, she called crying. She said she felt exactly like she did back four years ago. No friends, she didn't fit in, etc. She also said she knew it would be ok in time, but at the moment she just couldn't stop crying. This lasted for 3 days. The fourth day, she was fine. </p>

<p>Our advice to her the night she called was to get out of her dorm room, go to the athletic center and climb a wall, work out, go for a swim, climb the hill behind campus, just get out of her room and do something physical. She went out that night and did all kinds of things and she's been slowly but surely making friends.</p>

<p>So, get out of that room and go for a walk, sign up for an exercise class, go on a canoe outing, go for a bike ride. You'll feel better for sure and you just might meet someone.</p>

<p>oops-didn't realize there was more than the first page. I guess the OP has more issues than just homesickness, so take my comments with a grain of salt.</p>

<p>when my Ds were in middle school, they both had the same mean icky teacher...it was hard, 7th grade is an important year where we live, because that is the year that counts for HS applications....they wanted to transfer etc...anyway, what I suggested, while it was not feesible to transfer, don't let the teacher and the school get you down, because those grades you are getting in 7th grade will get you into that HS...having a goal while in that teachers class got them through the year so their options were wide open when it came to HS</p>

<p>What I am saying is, while you are at your school, knowing pretty much you are going to transfer, you need to work hard so that options will be available, so you need to think about where you want to be, and have a plan...if you do poorly in the classes, you won't be an attractive transfer student....you have to do well despite where you are....</p>

<p>baseballmom suggestions actually weren't far off the mark- and the suggestion to go to the counselling center, very on the mark as well...</p>

<p>I think you need to get busy, keep busy, and to remember, if you want to go somewhere else, you need to be a student the other school will want</p>

<p>This is going to have to be a full frontal assault by you get where you want to be, and that is talking to someone, doing some research, setting goals, pulling it together for your classes, staying busy- gym, walking, service work</p>

<p>It is a huge disappointment when your fantasy of college doesnt work out...but you need to get past the disappointment and get working on your future, and to do that you need to take care of the here and now</p>

<p>Think about it this way, is constantly thinking about how miserable you are getting you to a new place, is getting not great grades getting you to that new place, is hiding away getting you to that new place, is thinking about your friends all the time getting you to that new place....no, BUT talking to a counselor, going to class and learning, doing research about schools to transfer to, checking out the process, etc....that will get you to that new place....you need to take all that disappointment, all that angry frustrated energy, and channel it into what you want for yourself...</p>

<p>do you have a peer advisor, resident advisor, faculty advisor, or someone who you could talk to at the school?</p>

<p>It really is a huge adjustment and as I explained to someone else recently, it can feel as if you have landed on another planet.</p>

<p>thx for the help you guys! i just told my parents about it and they surprisingly support me 100%! :) no matter what i decide. this makes me feel so much better and it is helping me focus more. i just hate the fact that i'll have to start over again. but i guess i have to do what i have to do...</p>

<p>I am so very happy that you spoke to your parents about your situation, and that you now know you have their support in your decision making.</p>

<p>I wish you all the luck with your college experience. </p>

<p>I just want to tell you that after my daughter came home last week I was afraid that family and friends would be very judgemental about her decision, to my surprise.....everyone has been so supportive. Then the stories start rolling around of how they know someone who came home also. </p>

<p>You will not be the only one to make changes!
Best of Luck</p>

<p>Good for you- I think one of the hardest parts may have been to tell your parents. And see, we parents can still surprise our kids- I am so glad they are supportive and understanding of the situation. I think now you can concentrate on what you must do next--find the school that best meets your needs (and just practically speaking) continue with your studies for the next semester of two and get as many credits as you can to transfer to the new school. Good luck!!</p>

<p>Good luck wannago -- youth is too short to spend it in a school you're not happy with.</p>

<p>PS Have you called Howard yet ???
PPS Give us updates, will ya? Some of us are kind of emotionally invested in you now :)</p>

<p>Yes, wannagotocornell, please do tell us when you start the transfer process. Hop to it!</p>

<p>Awwww, thanks guys. :)</p>

<p>Well I contacted Howard and GWU. They both said that I will have to apply again as a transfer student. :/ Should I call again to see if I can get a different answer? </p>

<p>I'm actually somewhat starting the process now...Some colleges recommend getting all the forms in by October 1st (GWU)..or November 1st at the latest. I already began working on online apps..I just need to write some essays...get some recs..transcripts..SAT...fees..fin. aid forms...is that it? Lol. My list is GWU, Howard, College Park, UMBC or Towson, and Morgan (not sure if anyone here has heard of it). If don't get into gwu/howard, i plan on just staying instate and do like classics/business/economics/art history and do design in grad school. wish me luck!</p>

<p>We all wish you luck. You have some very nice schools on your list.</p>

<p>I think you will feel better about your remaining time at VT now that you are starting the transfer process. You're giving yourself choices, and you won't feel as though you're trapped at VT anymore. Knowing that you only have to stay at VT for a semester or a year is very different from thinking that you're stuck there for four years.</p>

<p>The funny thing is, though, by the time you get your transfer application acceptances, you may have decided that VT is tolerable after all. And there would be nothing wrong with that, either.</p>

<p>Just a quick update...</p>

<p>I had planned today on attending 2 club meetings..(geared towards minorities)...and of course, no one showed up!! I'm just so angry right now..I wasted my whole day planning on attending these meetings, hopefully trying to meet new people and have some fun. But, no. I don't know why minorities here don't want to get involved. It really is bothering me. I don't like it at all. And it is making me want to leave even sooner.</p>

<p>You mentioned before that you were advised to reapply as a transfer.</p>

<p>I think you're doing all the right things to pursue that option, but I'd also suggest you call back Admissions again, this time ask for a director or supervisor and re-ask about your specific situation. Additionally, you may want to consider sending an email highlighting your credentials and original aid you were given, directed to the person in authority. Then ask for a phone meeting to discuss your dilemma after he/she's had a chance to review your request.</p>

<p>We've learned that most good employees are trained to "follow the rules". However, a person in authority may see in your situation a reason to bend them...particularly with regard to the challenges of the diversity problem you're facing. It's worth another try. I wouldn't stop the regular transfer process you've begun as a parallel path. But you never know until you try what can happen. It seems to me you're following your heart and that rarely is a bad decision. Best of luck to you. Please keep us posted--we care about you!</p>

<p>thanks.But I'm not exactly sure what to say to them. Just say I'm having problems with diversity, I want a more urban school, and want to be closer to home...or should I go into more detail than that...?</p>

<p>I think I would focus on the fact that you originally had a VERY difficult time making a decision and that in retrospect, GW or Howard, could give you those things you are craving. You could remind them you were accepted previously and are so very sorry you didn't accept their offer. You can speak to some of your observations which you have articulated so well in some of your posts above. By writing down some of these things, you'll be able to craft a well-written, meaningful and persuasive letter that could, perhaps, sway the right person into accepting you once again, without re-doing the application process. Often, it is easier to verbalize a complicated situation in writing than it is to communicate it over the phone. By sending the letter and ASKING for a follow up "meeting via phone", you'll be able to present your case both ways.</p>

<p>I really do wish you much luck with this process...although I don't think you'll really need it :)</p>

<p>There's a great deal to be said for someone who recognizes when she's made a mistake...I think if you put forth your feelings in a mature, positive way without sounding whiny, you may very well be heard. In any case, it certainly can't hurt.</p>

<p>wannagotocornell - I went through the whole (pressure-filled in our case and maybe in yours) transfer process with my S last year, when Tulane eliminated his major due to Katrina. I think you have excellent chances at your target schools. Sorry that you have to (maybe) go through the formal transfer process, but just want to offer any assistance that I can if you need it - reviewing essays/logistics. Some of the schools may have kept your app on file, so you may not need to re-send certain things (hs transcript, SAT etc.). Small help, but maybe a little.</p>

<p>ok, update for those who want it. I think someone mentioned to wait 6 weeks at the least, and I'll like it...well, this is the end of week 6. and i'm getting more miserable as we speak. I'm trying to remain calm and develop some inner peace, but every night I end up shaking and crying myself to sleep about how long I have to be here. Parents are really no help because all they say is suck it up and how spoiled I am. Roomate annoys me. I don't want to tell my home/college friends how miserable I am because they are all enjoying college. So I pretty much feel alone in this. I only feel happy when I get to go home and I can see life again.</p>

<p>If I hear one more person, tell me to wait to Thanksgiving break, christmas break, wait a year, you'll love it...I think i'm going to scream! What if it's just not right? Why do I have to stay longer than necessary?
thank God fall break is next week.</p>