<p>Lovetocamp.</p>
<p>Thank's for asking. Things went really well his sophomore year. It was the freshman year (especially the first semester) that was so difficult, in so many ways. If you read much of the thread, we went through a very difficult period. Prior to going to college, we saw our son every day, and we had a very close relationship. We all ate together, we watched movies together, we had been a close knit family. Then, after arriving at colllege, it seemed like he became someone that we hardly knew. There was a period where he did not seek us out (via phone calls or emails, etc.), and worse he did not respond to our attempts to stay in contact with him. Probably the worst part of the problem was the "not knowing". Not knowing if he was ok - and just was not communicating. Or, Not knowing if he was not ok, and for whatever reason was not able to communicate with us. We just did not know. The worst period, when a few weeks went by, with no contact at all, we finally called the dorm admin offices, and they sent someone to his room to verify he was ok. He called us - about 30 minutes later, and luckily he was ok and had not been kidnapped, or worse. (again, we had no information with which to conlude whether he was ok, or not). We were worried for the health and safety of our first born. We became frantic. After that call, when we knew (at that momennt) that he was ok, we were ok for a short while. But things did not change much during the first year. We came to realize that he did not have the same need or interest to stay in contact with us. When he came home for the summer, things reverted back to like the old days. We saw him every day. He was close to us again, we did things together, etc. So, it wasn't that he had changed to a new person. I guess he just discovered how nice it is to be away, and he discovered freedom - to do, or not do, whatever he wanted. We still were somewhat hurt that he 'chose' not to communicate more often. But we learned to accept what little we received. And we learned to initiate contact (even when we would have prefered to have him initiate the contact). </p>
<p>His second year, things improved in two ways. (1) We (his parents) 'needed' LESS the second years than we did the first year. I guess we (his parents) adapted, out of necessity, to move on with our life. So, we were not as intense about wondering how he was, nor did we think about it as often. (2) He showed signs of contacting us more often on his own. Though his self initiated contacts were still somewhat rare, it was a nice change from the first year. Most of the contacts were due to his needing something, or having some specific question. Nonetheless, we appreciated the contact, regardless of the reason. :-) </p>
<p>This summer, things continue to be fine, as we await his junior year. </p>
<p>What a learning experience. </p>
<p>Again, we can not express deeply enough our tremendous appreciation to the dozens of people who posted to our thread. We cried, more than once, while reading some of the pain that other people were going through, as they attempted to share our pain. So many posts had very wise advice. It would be worth writing a book, gathering together all the comments, from all the many different people. It was 'not' helpful to hear from the parents who coldly told us to 'get a life' or 'leave him alone', etc. But those type of comments were in the minority. The vast majority of comments were VERY helpful to us. Thank you again, to each and every person who helped us during that very trying period of our life.</p>